Starring Megan Fox, Will Arnett, William Fichtner, Whoopi Goldberg, Tohoru Masamune, Minae Noji, Alan Ritchson, Noel Fisher and Danny Woodburn.
Directed by Jonathan Liebesman.
This movie is about as good as it could possibly be. The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles aren’t exactly The Magnificent Seven.
For starters, I appreciated how they handled the origin. We didn’t have the first half-hour of the movie dedicated to the defining moment and the training to get us up to present-day. We get it in about three minutes of explanation when intrepid reporter April O’Neil (Megan Fox) meets the sensai rat Splinter (played by Danny Woodburn, voiced by Tony Shalhoub).
I’m also relieved to report that WIlliam Fichtner is not playing Shredder. Shredder is played by the massive Tohoru Masamune, and he does a good job. Fichtner is the CEO millionaire Eric Sacks, and if there’s one thing we know about CEO millionaires in movies, it’s that they will eventually be revealed as villains.
The four Turtles are more roid-looking than any previous incarnation, and they have their color, weapon and personality assignment. (Leonardo’s the leader, Raphael’s the rebel, Donatello’s the brain, and Michelangelo’s the clown.) And since Michael Bay produced this, we get our share of swooping camera-shots, fast-cut action, and blatant product placement. But the story moves quickly and it isn’t too long.
How’s this for a pull-quote? “If you have fond memories of TMNT from your youth, this won’t ruin it.”